You are...
...sitting, standing in front of a computer, holding a portable devie, waiting for a bus, supposed to be working (got you!), sitting on the loo (got you as well), on a train, hopefully not driving a car, laying on your bed, multi-tasking, eating, breathing.
But most importantly, you are reading this right now.
A while ago or let’s say pretty much all my life until about 1 year ago, I was living day by
day. “Hating” is too harsh, rather letting the week just happen and hoping it
would pass quickly until the longed for weekend came. I always imagined my
weeks to be like one of those old curved bridges with their highest point in
the middle of them.
The side I started
from represented Mondays. This side was ugly, dark. But once I passed the hard
way until I reached the middle of the Week, Wednesday, everything became easier
and finally on other side the weekend was waiting for me! Life finally seemed
good again.
But guess what?
Monday always came, no matter how much I tried to stay on the fun side of the
bridge. I mean I still get that Monday blues. There are times it is dragging me
down more and there are times, I just see it as what it is: the start of a new
week. Period. It is neither the apocalypse nor the daunting day my freedom has
come to an end.
Why am I writing
this? I am pretty sure a lot of people know these feelings very well. And I did
not realize there was a different way to live my life. 2016 taught me one heck
of a lesson. There will be a series of posts going deeper into what exactly
happened as time goes by. For now I want to pick one detail, a piece that
contributed big time to the puzzle I am still putting together: mindfulness.
I am aware this has
become a huge trend. But hey, a couple years ago (ok, more like 10 years ago
*feeling old for a second*) I laughed at people wearing skinny jeans, and now
many people love them. I hope you get the point. Anyways, mindfulness.
I am not
copying a definition from somewhere, I am just expressing what it means to me:
being in the moment, sucking up everything from this moment. For example when I
am sitting on the train, eyes closed, trying to feel my feet anchored to the
ground, feel how soft or hard the seat is that I am sitting on. The smells
around me, is anyone eating? Drinking coffee? I hear the rumbling of the train,
people talking, steps, beeping sounds, music. I focus on my breathing. How is
the quality of the air? I feel how my heart is beating and hear the pulse
waves. Every now and then my mind drifts off: that colleague who got on my
nerves, I have to remember to call my mom, I should exercise, I am tired,
shopping lists etc… I realize my thoughts are drifting. I get a little angry. I
mean, how difficult is it to just not worry about other things for 1 minute
even for 30 seconds?
Then comes my magic
moment. I know, I am not my thoughts. They do not determine who I am. I know, I
do not need to follow every single thought. Like trains passing by, no need to
board all of them. I know, things will not get better, if I think about them in
that very moment. So I regain power of my thoughts and just let them go until I
feel like I am ready to go on with my everyday life.
These little moments
serve as my foundation. After practicing these more or less planned
mini-time-outs, I felt ready to translate it a step further. To me, this meant
finding little moments of joy more spontaneously. Seeing a nice flower, nice
shades of the evening sky, my dog’s fur on my face, laughter, seeing other
people smile for no obvious reason, a good cappuccino, the first sip of coffee
in the morning. You can see, I could go on and on and on.When you are new to
this way of living, chances are high you find yourself thinking “good lord, it
is coffee, I drink it every morning. Of course it is tasty, but come on. It is
coffee. How special is that?”. Recognize yourself there? Well I was just the
same. But after numerous attempts at slowing my life down, for example when I
take my first sip of coffee in the morning, I started feeling the difference.
And it felt good. Like the warmth of the sun touching your face when you are feeling
cold.
For me, a huge part
of mindfulness is not only to know how it’s done and that I am aware of my
ability to practice it, but to now be able to enjoy the fact it has become more
natural to me.
Of course I still
get the Monday morning blues. But Mondays through Fridays are no longer just 5
terrible days that separate me from enjoying myself, they also bring me
beautiful moments.
And here comes the next enjoyable moment: finishing off this post
sitting in front of a beautiful red flower.
I wish you beautiful moments,
take care of
yourself
Chantal
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